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Charles Firth

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How will the lockdown affect me? We answer all your questions that we’ve just made up
The Chaser has compiled this informative guide about the new lockdown laws
JobKeeper allowance to enable businesses to keep underpaying workers throughout the crisis
Just like they normally do
Government stimulus on track to be available in time for the 2120 pandemic
"It's exactly like the bushfire recovery program, but bigger."
NSW bans House Party app after fun in Sydney moves online
People drinking at home will also be required to pour their beer into plastic glasses after 10pm
Morrison double-checks that eviction ban covers Kirribilli House
The ban has been welcomed by people who have a tenuous grip on their place of residence
PM denies extra assistance to renters, claiming he’s “tough on boarders”
He's certainly not “tough on borders”
Dickhead uses Twitter thread to outline harrowing account of what it’s like to not have Covid-19
The thread is a cautionary tale for people who might be thinking that being a dickhead isn't such a bad thing
Government asks virus to hold off for six weeks so they can get stimulus sorted
The PM said he’d been working incredibly hard — sometimes up to 3 or 4 hours a day
Morrison decides to use to novelty oversized prop to make people take him more seriously
"Now that he's used a novelty over-sized prop, I realise the gravity of the situation," coughed one finance executive
Cat does better job writing report than home worker
"Great work on that report," the boss is reported to have emailed back
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