Disappointed cocaine dealer cancels plans to buy a yacht following Lehrmann ruling

A Sydney based cocaine dealer has disappointedly cancelled his purchase of a brand new yacht following ‘lying rapist’ Bruce Lehrmann’s humiliating defamation loss.

“Does Bruce not think about the consequences of his actions?” said Dave Baggins. “If he had gotten that payout I would have been rolling in cash, but now I just need to use the money from other political staffers and Channel 7. Which is enough to fund the mansion sure, but not enough to add on a yacht.”

“Plus my plans to open a Karaoke bar are completely ruined.”

“All he had to do was not rape anyone and we would have had so much money, the literal lowest bar possible. What a total cunt. Maybe I should just stop hanging out with political staffers, they are really hurting the reputation of drug cartels everywhere.”

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