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Cam Smith

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Facebook admits CEO Mark Zuckerberg personally views and rates every single one of your nudes out of 10
"Yours are all sevens."
Hip priest desperately trying to shoehorn ball tampering reference into Easter sermon
"This is a lot like... the time Judas... tampered with Jesus' balls... no that's no good."
Putin wins landslide victory with 120% of the vote
Putin is attributing the victory to his policies, his popularity, and the surprise death of all his opponents
Man unwinds from long day staring at screen with a few hours of slightly different screen
"Sometimes I like to mix it up by looking at an even smaller screen while watching something on the bigger screen."
Anti-corporate hippy completes image with $70,000 Kombi campervan
"It'll go perfectly with my new $500 ripped jeans."
Mardi Gras ends at 7pm as married couples decide to call it a night
"Well it's been lovely, but we've got an early start tomorrow."
Barnaby Joyce to join Fred Nile at Mardi Gras praying for sanctity of marriage
"Marriage is a sacred institution between a woman, a man, and his hot staffers."
Grandma wishes grandson a “Very happy sent from my iPhone”
"Hi.... timmy! Lots Of.. Love,, Gransent from my iPhone"
“I’m not afraid of shooters” tweets Trump from bullet proof car
"I never run from a fight," said the man who famously dodged the draft five times
Republican party implodes after abortion performed with gun
"Banning abortion stomps on every American's right to shoot a pregnant woman in the stomach."