Charles Firth's Posts
July 19, 2018
MyHealth data to be stored on a highly-secure state-of-the-art Commodore 64
Minister Greg Hunt today told reporters the website was far too unreliable for hackers to be able gain access. "Our protection is flawless: if anyone tries to gain unauthorised access, chances are, they'll just end up with a 404: The Website Not Found message. You can't get more secure than that."
July 3, 2018
David Leyonhjelm only got into the Senate by promising not to have sex with anyone
David Leyonhjelm only got into the Senate by promising not to have sex with anyone, it was revealed today
June 22, 2018
Optus to buy ABC, and stream it on its app: “What can go wrong?”
"Private enterprise is much better at delivering reliable services. I mean, except for Telstra, the Commonwealth Bank, Medibank and the power companies."
June 10, 2018
Five Amazing Facts About the Queen’s Birthday Holiday
It's the Queen's Birthday Long Weekend, but did you know these astounding facts about this holiday?
June 8, 2018
Poo jogger hoping incident will quickly blow over
The poo jogger has told friends he’s hoping everyone will quickly forget the whole thing ever happened and move on with their lives
June 7, 2018
NBN chief says gamers to blame for the dodgy butter chicken he had last night
The attack comes days after Bill Morrow attacked gamers for using the internet, claiming they were slowing down the network. He pleaded with users to stop using the NBN, pointing out it would be much faster if nobody used it
June 1, 2018
Shock addition to our Live Show line-up
Andrew Hansen joins The Chaser’s Charles Firth and The Shovel’s James Schloeffel, plus one special as-yet unannounced guest
May 31, 2018
Barnaby Joyce blames entire career on Ambien
"Look, I'm terribly sorry about the Sunday Night interview, I was Ambien interviewing," he said, speaking privately to the entire national media
May 31, 2018
Barnaby Joyce wondering whether interview will affect future chances of picking up
Barnaby Joyce has expressed privately to the nation’s media that he’s beginning to suspect the events of the past few months may adversely affect his ability to pick up staffers in the future
May 25, 2018
Foley defends ‘white flight’ comments: “I was incredibly drunk when I said it”
"To be honest, I usually try and hide racism by dressing it up with a bullshit class analysis. But I was so drunk I completely forgot to do that."
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