National
-
National
Auspost claims Holgate wasn’t home when they tried to deliver her an apology
They did however, fill out a “Sorry we missed you” card, which they put in her neighbour’s letter box.
-
National
PM announces vaccine rollout will begin “sometime in the near… hey what’s that behind you?”
“Anyway it’s getting pretty chilly lately don’t you think?” asked the PM
-
National
PM announces he has ‘secured’ a coffee from a cafe
No confirmation yet on whether the cafe has accepted the order
-
National
PM announces new AstraZeneca vaccine rollout exclusively for women
‘Lads let’s be gentlemen and just wait for a different vaccine’
-
National
PM apologises after accidentally referring to Minister Cunt as ‘Honourable’
Use of the term was offensive to dictionaries everywhere
-
National
PM clarifies Christine Holgate was fired from AusPost for not being corrupt enough
What was she thinking doing something by the book?
-
National
PM realises they somehow missed the crucial ‘starting the vaccine rollout’ step of the rollout
“Oh that’s where we went wrong, whoopsie”
-
National
“I’m too busy ignoring our sexual predators to rollout the vaccine” explains PM
He only has so much time to intentionally screw things up
-
National
PM announces Marise Payne is the “Prime Minister to Take the Blame on Women”
Strong female representation in the scapegoat industry