General News
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General News
Lost mountain-climber already envisioning book deal
“I might even get to meet the guys from 60 minutes!”
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General News
Attempt to start standing ovation unsuccessful
A concert-goer has tried and failed to single-handedly rouse his fellow audience members to a standing ovation.
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General News
UN Security Council fails to enforce New Year’s resolution
“This issue has proven more difficult to enforce than we anticipated”
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General News
7-Eleven clerk lives vicariously through condom purchaser
“Maybe he can give me a few pointers for picking up that blonde who always buys NW and a pack of peppermint Extra.”
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General News
‘Nutbush City Limits’ revives party
There was a brief moment of panic a few songs later, when Watts accidentally played ‘It’s Raining Men’ instead of ‘Loveshack’.
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General News
Boyfriend dumped after unfavourable Cleo quiz result
Kurkova was “shocked and heartbroken” when her fiancée scored a mere four out of twenty for compatibility.
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General News
Lazy environmentalist stages drive against global warming
His “honk if you hate fossil fuels” bumper sticker is changing the world.
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General News
Earring ruins Doctor’s credibility
“I’d be worried about his ability to make sound judgements with a look so clearly inspired by 90s boybands.”