General News

“They’re just a fun, stylish accessory to wear to the park”

“Census took an interest in me, instead of just rambling about their bets.”

“The ABC ombudsman is too focused on the public interest instead of the billionaire interest.”

“I’m sick of being blamed every time a man does something” he said despite no one blaming him.

Reports suggest the area has seen a sudden spike in knifing related incidents.

“Premier Allan has left me a note reminding you all that your actions represent the state and to treat me like you did her,”

“The Matrix is out to get me and force me to cover up my ankles.”

“He is clearly dangerous and needs to either be deported or put down humanely.”

We continue the decades long loop of media and politicians acknowledging the widespread issue, before falling short of doing anything about it.

“We never voted for outages. Yet another lie.”