Business
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Business
Weird: network that ‘didn’t need’ journalists enough to pay them properly, completely fucks up Olympics coverage while journalists are on strike
“And who wants to hear from sport journalists who know what they are talking about anyway, we have Karl Stefanovic still!”
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Business
Nine advertises multiple ‘scab’ roles with immediate start
(Following the strike action against Channel 9, the outlet has posted the following job listing)
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Business
Telstra reassures customers that staff cuts won’t affect trademark 4 hour hold times
“I give you this promise Australia, no matter how many people we mercilessly fire to protect our profits and bonuses, you won’t notice anything different.”
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Business
Woolies CEO Brad Banducci asks if embarrassing retirement announcement can be taken off the record
“You’re not going to use that right?”
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Business
“I don’t get why responding to emails after work would be a hassle, just have your assistant do it” says local executive in exclusive interview
We speak to a local millionaire executive in an exclusive interview about the proposed changes to employment law.
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Business
Jetstar introduces “door stays on” fee
Oxygen masks will drop from the ceiling if no door is paid for (oxygen sold separately)
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Business
Woolworths announces public executions for holiday season shoplifters
Australia’s number one grocery prison has announced a brand new policy stating that loss prevention officers will be granted license to shoot any suspected shoplifter on sight. “Do you think this is a fucking joke?” sprayed a nameless executive wearing a balaclava at a press conference. “We put in the security gates, the guards, the…
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Business
Optus CEO resigned three weeks ago but was unable to contact the board
“Instead of waiting for the network to work, I just used carrier pigeons.”
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Business
Qantas loses voice referendum in transit
“I knew Yes should have chosen a different airline”