MyHealth data to be stored on a highly-secure state-of-the-art Commodore 64
Minister Greg Hunt today told reporters the website was far too unreliable for hackers to be able gain access. "Our protection is flawless: if anyone tries to gain unauthorised access, chances are, they'll just end up with a 404: The Website Not Found message. You can't get more secure than that."
Scientists Announce A.I. Now Advanced Enough To Run Fish and Chips Store
"Turns out even a One Nation sentator could do it, so it clearly doesn't require too much intelligence."
Lazy sniffer dog just sits down next to any festival-goer with dreads
"Its either them or anyone wearing Nike TNs"
Mutant Ninja Turtles now experiencing mid-life crisis
The one-time Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles have spent their mid-thirties questioning their life choices of living in a sewer and eating only Pizza
David Leyonhjelm only got into the Senate by promising not to have sex with anyone
David Leyonhjelm only got into the Senate by promising not to have sex with anyone, it was revealed today
Man quits smoking his own cigarettes
High taxes have successfully dissuaded Darren from smoking his own fags
Optus to buy ABC, and stream it on its app: “What can go wrong?”
"Private enterprise is much better at delivering reliable services. I mean, except for Telstra, the Commonwealth Bank, Medibank and the power companies."
Socceroos fans begin search for team they’ll support when Australia is eliminated
"Maybe I'll pick Russia, at least we will know they will have the home crowd, and the American government backing them."
North Korean/US Tensions Reignite as Both Leaders Claim Handshake Win
"This means war"
Driver Of Swastika Tank Revealed
"We should have known"