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Drunk Barnaby Joyce calls for ‘right to disconnect’ from Canberra sidewalk

Former deputy prime minister and sleep paralysis demon for anyone who has entered the Prayer Room, Barnaby Joyce has broken ranks in the Coalition to come out in support for the ‘right to disconnect’ following a week of debate.

However Joyce, who was clearly very drunk, called on the government to implement the right to disconnect claiming that he wants to be able to disconnect from the Canberra sidewalk he was laying on.

“This is my personal time,” slurred Joyce, “I should not be forced to lay here unable to get up!”

“This farken gove-ment needs to give me the right to stand back uppp.. You know what who needs them, I can do it myself. Here we go… wait no… this time… oh god.”

After thirty more minutes of flailing around trying to get up, Joyce yelled, “Why is the pavement refusing to let me leave? I am not at work, it’s after five, let me go home!”

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