National
-
National
Bernadi welcomes new party members by booking entire table at Sizzler
Although Bernardi considers himself a “lone wolf”, he hopes booking the entire booth at one of the last Sizzlers in Australia will help entice some supporters.
-
National
School year off to bad start as teacher nurses massive long weekend hangover
The kids weren’t the only ones learning a lesson. Actually, they didn’t learn one at all.
-
National
Family brands mum ‘Unaustralian’ for picking wrong animal carcass to eat on Australia Day
Following an investigation, Ms Stoop will promptly be sent to Manus Island
-
National
‘Progressive’ bogan drunkenly suggests alternative dates for Australia Day
Darren ‘Dazza’ Marsh, 32, has defied the naysaying of his drunken mates at the pub to come up with his own list of “bloody ‘Strayan” alternatives.
-
National
Another Baird backflip: “Actually I’m not resigning”
In yet another embarrassing reversal for his Government, Mike Baird has backflipped on his promise earlier today that he would be resigning as Premier of NSW.
-
National
Mike Baird retires from politics to focus on ruining his kid’s social lives
IN a move that has surprised many, NSW Premier Mike Baird has announced his sudden resignation from politics, effective next week. Baird commented that he was looking forward to the opportunity to spend time with his family “and at the casino of course.” While conservatives have been saddened by the news, the loudest cries of…
-
National
Baird government creates lockout laws for 24-hour gyms
Further plans include a state-wide ban on all ‘Tapout’ shirts.
-
National
NSW Premier outlaws coward punching of kangaroos
Shoot them, eat them, but whatever you do – don’t punch them.
-
National
Gina Rinehart euthanised after Melbourne Cup fall
THE Emirates Melbourne Cup has once again come under fire for its lack of humanity after mining magnate and Australia’s richest woman Gina Rinehart fell down during the race and subsequently had to be euthanised. Reports say that Ms Rinehart forced herself to stand in the immediate aftermath of the fall, but her injury and…
-
National
NT News hire actual Crocodile to writing staff
Estuary insider hired to help tip the scales