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Man struggling to pay rent relieved to hear the budget will be in surplus

A local struggling renter has let out a sigh of relief after reading reports that the Labor government that ran on a platform of ‘no one left behind’ is predicted to deliver a budget surplus this year.

The renter said that it warmed his heart to hear the government will have spare money during this cost of living crisis that they are choosing to do nothing with, saying the feeling from reading this news has left him warmer than the broken heater his landlord refuses to fix.

“I was so worried for the government,” he said while taking out a pay-day loan to pay for his groceries, “I mean my share of the rent has gone up $150 a week so it’s impressive that they were able to find build up some savings in these tough times all while still giving themselves raises.”

“You know when they said they couldn’t afford to address the housing and rental crises, I was worried about what other sacrifices they would need to make, so I am really glad to hear they are being fiscally responsible without giving up on the most important things in society like nuclear submarines, new gas fracking projects for political donors, private jet flights to hang out with the Murdoch’s, or even worse their tax cuts for the rich.”

In response to this announcement, the Labor government have announced their own version of the Morrison government’s ‘back in black’ mugs which on the back say “No one left behind”, which welfare recipients will be able to use while they beg for money living out of their car.

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