National

Local café owner Brent Morrow is this morning jubilant after the Fair Work Commission scrapped penalty rates which he’d never adhered to and never planned to adhere to. Morrow told staff this morning that the FWC decision was a vindication of his decision to underpay his workers in the first place. He is planning to use the decision…

If approved, the tax will see a significant increase in the price of fast food, Nutella, eye drops and bubble wrap, among other items.

The CEO of Seven West Media has expressed the colleagues a creeping suspicion that his ex-lover Amber Harrison “might be a bit angry” with him, after she was dumped and then sacked from her job at Seven.

By levying a tax of $1 on each backflip Malcolm Turnbull makes, the government expects to raise billions.

Scott Morrison has said he will have no choice but to increase taxes in order to fund a $50 billion welfare scheme. “We’ve already committed to cutting company tax by $50 billion over the next ten years,” he said. “And somebody has to pay for it. It’s one of the biggest welfare schemes in Australia’s history.”…

Behavioural economists say the “death tax” could save Australians up to $3.4 billions in funeral expenses over 57 years and promote a longer life span, by disincentivising people to die.

After the children took their group photo with the corpse, the body was taken to the NSW coroner for more group photos, and then an examination.

The Liberal party is hoping to preference their sense of humanity fourth, after One Nation, the Nationals and Donald Trump.

“This is coal” the treasurer said triumphantly on Thursday, “We met about two months ago and it’s been a whirlwind since then.”

Opposition leader Bill Shorten has challenged Malcolm Turnbull to a “meeting” outside a McDonald’s carpark in hopes the two men will settle their differences ‘once and for all”.