General News

No it’s not Plibersek or Wong

“I’m in my self-improvement era,”

“This is about how long I’m normally waiting anyway” said Dave from Sydney.

Microsoft has put out a statement saying they are doing everything they can to get their systems back up and running, hoping to harness the smugness energy of Mac users for the reboot.

Many have been accused of ‘Breaking the internet’ in the past, but only Microsoft and CrowdStrike have managed to actually do it.

Panned as “embarassing” and “lacking any proven basis in reality”, Channel 7’s editorial standards have been mocked for years.

I don’t just want the ‘Andrew O’Keefe’ special; I want the full ‘Bruce Lehrmann’!”

Rudd also offered advice on campaigning but the Democrats declined explaining they actually want to win the election.

“So let’s get back to what the day is all about, remembering all the losses we have tragically seen on the slots.”

The sport will have three separate events: Synchronised Spin-talk, Oppression Relay and The Marginalisation Decathlon.