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No vote wins, country now very clearly no longer divided

Australia has voted against the proposed Indigenous voice to parliament, following months of exhausting arguments and abuse of many people online and in person, the mood everywhere is ‘very clearly’ that division is now completely gone like the No campaign claimed a no vote would bring.

The result, which will mean that First Nations people will remain out of the conversations about issues affecting them and left out of the constitution, has been celebrated by some of the country’s heroes of bringing people together who would never stoke division despite their long personal histories of racism.

“Well done Australia,” said Peter Dutton, “we have stopped those trying to divide us all up. Now we can get back to the proper work of deporting all yes voters and locking up all refugees into detention centres.”

“We stopped the racism,” said Pauline Hanson, “now we can all come together as one nation who don’t put any race above any others. We just put down those terrifying Asians, Muslims, Aboriginal Australians and any other people of colour.”

“You did an amazing job defending democracy,” said the Murdoch family after calling off Australia’s version of Jan 6, “I mean this advisory body would have been a major threat to how things operate. We need to preserve the influence of the traditional owner of your democracy, us.”

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