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Second spill imminent: Dutton running as the lack-of-consensus candidate

Peter Dutton announced he would put himself forward on Thursday morning as the lack-of-consensus candidate in yet another leadership spill of the Liberal party room. 

This comes after rumours started spreading that a consensus candidate, such as Julie Bishop, may run in order to stifle Dutton’s bid to lead them to a crushing defeat at the next election.

The move comes as Dutton furiously hit the phones earlier in the day, trying to build numbers against incumbent Malcolm Turnbull. However, he changed course in the afternoon after he noticed that the more people he called, the fewer votes he had.

“In hindsight, not talking to anyone before the first ballot was a stroke of genius. It explains why so many MPs voted for me. As long as I don’t chat to anyone, I might just be able to hold onto enough votes to win,” said Mr Dutton.

Mr Dutton said that if there was one person who would be able to reach a lack-of-consensus in the Liberal Party, and disunite the nation, it was him. 

The move comes despite Mr Dutton being under a cloud. But supporters dismissed concerns, saying he’s under a cloud because potatoes need rain to grow.

Meanwhile, rumours that Scott Morrison is thinking of putting himself forward as a consensus candidate have been dismissed by party insiders. “The idea that Scott Morrison can think is preposterous,” one insider told The Chaser. “There’s certainly consensus around that.”

International observers have been shocked that another leadership spill would be happening so soon after Tuesday’s ballot, but Australian voters have come to know the occasion as “Thursday”. 



Charles Firth
WRITTEN BY

The Chaser Quarterly

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