Anthony Albanese elected as new Pope

Prime Minister Anthony Albanese has appeared triumphant following today’s conclave vote, being named the new Pope.

This comes after Donald Trump announced that he wanted to be the Pope, causing Albanese to win in a landslide as voters feared the idea of a Pope Trump.

The proud catholic Albanese gave an impassioned speech to his new following that included reading a Bible Verse and the scripture on his Medicare card.

Albanese teared up at one point telling a story about how growing up his mum never got to have a Popemobile.