Channel 7 loses WA election

While Rupert Murdoch struggles to give his fail-son the company that runs Australian politics, Kerry Stokes’ attempt to swoop in and take over WA has ended in a humiliating defeat with the Liberal Party losing in a landslide.

The Channel 7 boss tried a different tactic to Murdoch’s style of just backing whoever will win, by instead trying to back a dying political party and install former employee Basil Zempilas to a leadership position. A plan based on 7 media’s extensive experience in completely backing unlikeable men.

Barely incoming MP Zempilas, took a break from spending the entire election talking over his female party leader to centre himself and literally yelling over the top of a female panelist during 7’s election coverage after she suggested he had a problem with women, to claim that the reasons people dislike him were unfounded.

“Clearly the reason our party lost is because of the amount of recourses the other side had,” claimed Zempilas after years of free promotion from a media company with a stranglehold on the state.

“It was a conspiracy against me and my party by weaponising the things I have said and done in my time as Lord Mayor.”

Voters have now questioned why Seven Media chose to push such an unlikeable Sunrise host instead of the Cash Cow.