Local woman thrilled that social media ban will free her from arguing with 10 year olds on Dress to Impress

The Albanese government’s new social media ban for those under 16 has been met with mixed responses. While many are up in arms, local woman Amanda is “absolutely thrilled” to finally escape the clutches of preteen critiques on popular Roblox mini game Dress to Impress. 

“It’s a jungle out there. Every time I reference anything pre-2010s, some little rodent on the internet calls me jobless,” said Amanda, wiping tears of relief from her eyes, “I’ll be so glad when I don’t see 10-year-olds thinking of Ice Spice when the theme is Spice Girls.”

The new law means those under 16 will need to wait until they hit the ripe age of ‘too old to understand’ to participate in playing the game. 

“This isn’t just about removing kids from social media; it’s about giving us a break from the words ‘fanum tax’ and ‘skibidi toilet’ being used as common vocabulary” said Albanese.

“It’s time to allow adults to dress like adults, and Pauline Hanson to dress like a Muslim.”