Entertainment Archive
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Entertainment Archive
Schwarzenegger ends term as Governor: lowers himself into molten metal
The governor offered a frank apology for his shortcomings as a cybernetic organism programmed only to kill.
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Entertainment Archive
Harry Potter ends: children stop reading
“I’ll be saying ‘avada kedavra’ to my interest in books”
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Entertainment Archive
Even stars now sick of ‘Little Britain’
“We took random sketches from past shows and packaged them together for broadcast while we took a break,” said Lucas. “No-one noticed.”
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Entertainment Archive
Al Gore plants a tree to offset speech at Oscars
This story is generic and uninspired.
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Entertainment Archive
Tom, Katie unwrap 391st wedding e-meter
They’ll go well with the 17,042 free informational DVDs about Scientology.
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Entertainment Archive
Hair gel banned on planes: Il Divo cancels world tour
Pop-opera supergroup Il Divo has been forced to cancel its world tour after the foiled terrorist plot in Britain led to bans on liquids such as hair gel into hand-luggage. “Without inflight access to personal grooming products, our hairstyles will suffer, undoing all our years of hard work,” Swiss tenor Urs Bühler said. “Il Divo…
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Entertainment Archive
‘Bert’s Family Feud’ reinvigorates euthanasia debate
Television legend Bert Newton’s unseemly descent into mediocrity has led to calls for him to be allowed to prematurely his life and career with dignity. “It simply isn’t right,” said euthanasia advocate Jane Fitzgerald. “After a glorious career, he wouldn’t want to be remembered this way.” “If it was his decision, fine. But the show’s…
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Entertainment Archive
Dan Brown asks plagiarism accusers if they’ve got any ideas for a sequel
Da Vinci Code novelist Dan Brown has asked the writers of Holy Blood, Holy Grail whether they have any other far-fetched conspiracy theories that could be used for the sequel to his best-selling novel. “I’m looking for something involving the pyramids, the Masons, and the UN, but I’ll rip off any half-baked conspiracy theory I…
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Entertainment Archive
Waifish Kate Moss to promote diet coke
British model Kate Moss has bounced back from the loss of four modelling contracts this week with a lucrative new promotional deal for diet coke. The deal, rumoured to be worth up to twenty thousand grams per year, will see Moss model the drug cartel’s latest lines of low-calorie cocaine. “Kate did some magnificent work…