Pauline Hanson slams Woolies’ brown paper bags, demands white ones instead

Senator Pauline Hanson has announced her newest bizarre campaign, this time attacking brown paper bags, demanding all stores start stocking white bags instead.

“These bags are coming here and ruining our way of life,” she rambled, “I’m not against all paper bags the way some in the media try to claim I am, I am just against these brown ones.”

“I bet white paper bags feel like a stranger in their own Woolworths.”

Her policy gained immediate support from journalists and political staffers across the aisle, until they realised that by ‘white bags’ she doesn’t mean the kind you snort.