Trump vows to end Iran War as soon as he thinks of a new, more exciting war

US President and oil hoarder Donald Trump has vowed to end the war in Iran as soon as he thinks of a new, more exciting war to replace it with.

“There’s a lot of people telling me to end the Iran War, but nobody is giving me any solutions! Who am I gonna bomb instead? Give me some options!” urged the President.

“Seriously try being President without starting a war, the boredom could make you go crazy. What would you do all day? Golf only takes up so much time.”

Meanwhile, despite Trump not yet deciding the target or nature of his next war, Prime Minister Anthony Albanese has saved time by already pledging Australia’s unconditional support. 

Meanwhile Greenland has reportedly begun getting rid of all their oil.