In a bid to get more young Americans to vote, US senator Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez made history by streaming Among us with popular talented online content creators including Hasanabi, Jacksepticeye, Gus Johnson, Pokimane, and more, on Twitch to over 400,000 people making it the 3rd most viewed stream ever. It was clear to many that young viewers found it refreshing to relate to a politician showing genuine interest in something they enjoy in a natural and fun way. However not to be outdone, Republicans have scrambled together a similar plan by offering to ‘play a rousing game of croquet with some hip youths’.
“Greetings youngins,” said a representative for the GOP announcing the game while dressed like the Fonz holding a fidget spinner, “we have an exciting shindig for all you hip teens and cool cats. We love the young people because we can relate to you. So why don’t you join us for a rousing game of croquet? Assuming you aren’t too busy going down to the local meme show, am I right? As iCarly would say, it’s going to be legend, wait for it, dairy.”
After pulling out a chair to sit on backwards like all the worst teachers do, he continued, “Let me break it down for you kids and be real for a moment. There are some real issues at stake here. If you don’t vote for us, it will hurt our way of life. Joe Biden refuses to denounce Antifa and we all hate them right? If they raise taxes on the wealthy, gone will be your trips to father’s holiday estate. And don’t even get me started on the way they push to get guns out of schools, I think we all agree guns are for cool kids like you and me.”
“Unlike the ‘woke diverse’ leftists over there, we will be playing a real sport not some violent video games. Because unlike them, we share your concern that video games are to blame for all those mass-shootings that just keep happening. So, get ready to watch Ted Cruz take on Ben Shapiro and Kyle Rittenhouse in a friendly game of croquet, all filmed right here at this wicked cool country club and available to watch live on the Fox News Tv station. Bazinga!”
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