The Chaser Weakly
“We must stop division, and not listen to minorities” – By Peter Dutton
Issue #297
• Posted
Hello Australia, I’m here to talk to you all about the growing issue of division in this nation, something that deeply concerns me as someone who would never fan division, unlike those immigrants who we should lock up! I thought that we had solved division when we voted No on the referendum, for months the…

Hello Australia,
I’m here to talk to you all about the growing issue of division in this nation, something that deeply concerns me as someone who would never fan division, unlike those immigrants who we should lock up!
I thought that we had solved division when we voted No on the referendum, for months the nation clearly did not feel divided in any way, but sadly the division has returned.
The division has been irresponsibly flamed by a group of dangerous extremists, and not the good kind who I hang out with.
I am talking about the vile terrifying extremists who want to mourn the loss of every civilian who has died in the Middle East. What monsters!
Some of them have even taken to the streets to mourn there, and while they have been peaceful, I want you to imagine a world where instead of being peaceful they were violent and instead of mourning they were yelling “I love Terrorism, I love it so much and want to do all the terrorism”.
Do we want that on our streets? Clearly we must lock these peaceful people up so that they don’t turn into the violent ones I made up in my head. Chris Minns gets it.
These people can not be trusted when they say reasonable things. For all we know they could be the boogeyman.
The only minority you should only listen to my minority party in parliament when we say unreasonable things. It’s how we make sure to protect this nation.
Hopefully soon everyone will live life like I do, not seeing colour. Cause I close my eyes and put my fingers in my ear saying ‘la la la’ whenever a person of colour tries to talk to me.
Yours with love,
Peter Dutton
Leader of Opposing