“It’s unfair to call me ‘racist’ just because of what I’ve said and done”

Hello Australia,

It’s your favourite ‘non-monster’ Peter Dutton here to discuss the outlandish claim that I am ‘racist’. I mean who could possibly think that?

It is disgusting to see that people would suggest that my statements implying that child refugees are secretly terrorists, would in any way be discriminatory. What an unfair and dehumanising claim to make.

Who could be so cruel as to generalise me based on nothing more than the extensive list of all the things I have said and done over the years?

I mean the only thing scarier than a person of colour coming to Australia, is someone who would call someone else racist.

I have made my values clear. From the time I walked out of the apology to the Stolen Generation, or the time I made up stories about African gangs ruining Melbourne, or when I accused refugee women of lying about being sexually assaulted; I have shown the sort of character that led to me becoming a Queensland cop.

When I tortured refugees, I didn’t do it out of hatred. I did it out of love and the joy I got from torturing them.

I simply can not be a racist person. I mean, I have never been accused of being racist towards white people.

I am just a man who is concerned, because I know that migrants are to blame for all the problems in this country. Inflation? Caused by migrants. Burnt coffee? Caused by migrants. That time you went for a handshake when the other person went for a hug? Definitely caused by migrants.

I think it’s pretty clear that I am not racist nor do I stoke racist rhetoric. I just know that migrants are a threat to you and your family! (Not including white migrants obviously)

Yours,

Peter Dutton

Leader of the Opposition

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