‘Woke’ Australian cricket team strikes again, cancelling five day test matches 

The most hated Australian Men’s Cricket Team in history (as voted by the media) has once again turned up their infamous ‘wokeness’ by going full cancel culture on five day test matches.

In a classic move from young people today, these lazy players are simply refusing to have a full five day work week and have been knocking off early from the first couple Ashes matches.

“I don’t see what the issue is,” said ‘Captain Woke’ Pat Cummins, clearly showing no respect for the centuries old tradition.

“We’re smashing the poms. What’s the big deal, why would that be a bad thing?”

Some have suggested that the woke team heard how much former tv show host Piers Morgan cries online whenever Australia beats England, which is motivating them to do it in the fastest, least gentlemanly way possible.

Now Australian punters will have to wait and see whether this selfish woke squad will ruin another Aussie tradition by making the Boxing Day test completely unnecessary, forcing people to have to interact with their families post-Christmas. Disgusting.