New king crowned, ruler of Australia remains the same

A historic moment in the colony of Australia as a King Charles has just been crowned as the head of the commonwealth for a few years to come until he passes.

However, constitutional experts have reassured Australians that the coronation was merely a formality and that there will be no real changes to people’s day-to-day lives as the ruler of Australia’s democracy, Rupert Murdoch, has been spotted alive and will continue his reign.

This comes after earlier this week Prime Minister Anthony Albanese made his intentions to keep bending the knee to Australia’s overlord clear by appearing on Piers Morgan’s show despite objection from his core voters and most of Australia, pledging his allegiance on behalf of Australia in front of Morgan’s international audience comprised of tens of viewers.

“Some speculate that we want to abolish our ruling family to become an independent and free democracy” said PM Albanese, “but  I certainly don’t think we should be doing that any time soon. I have made it clear that Rupert didn’t like the idea of a media inquiry, so I will not move ahead with it.”

“As Prime Minister of this nation, I am always ready to pledge my allegiance and loyalty to the Murdoch family. Long may they reign.”