Labor approves new offshore gas project in floodwaters

The Australian government has approved yet another controversial fossil fuel plant, this time a gas project inside Australian floodwaters.

This comes as the nation’s monthly ‘once in a lifetime’ natural disaster has not stopped the government from ‘expanding’ projects by letting them build new ones well past 2050, while also pretending to care about reaching net 0.

“We need to plan for the future in a responsible way,” said the PM while swallowing caviar gifted to him from the fossil fuel industry, “it’s about acting in the best interest of our children.”

“We need to modernise our electricity production and there is nothing more modern than dealing with natural disasters. Now we can use them to make electricity for decades to come.”

“In a way this green gas is renewable as the more we use it, the more floods happen meaning more water that might have gas or oil underneath it.”

The government also announced an investment into research regarding using future bushfires to help burn coal for energy.