Dan Andrews announces plan to build wall around Victoria and make Sydney pay for it

Ruthless madman Dictator Dan has once again ramped up his conflict with the democratic and peaceful NSW government, after declaring plans to build a wall around the Victorian border with NSW, a wall he claims will be paid for by Sydney.

“When NSW send us their people they aren’t sending their best,” he claimed at a press conference today. “They’re sending Peta Credlin, they’re sending Alan Jones. And some, I guess, are good people. But we can’t take that chance.”

However, concerns are growing among eagle eyed watchers that this may simply be a diversionary tactic to lower NSW’s guard before an eventual invasion.

“We will starve them out by setting up a ring of steel around the city,” Dan told his war room today. “We will force a surrender by capturing their most valuable resource – the elite private school kids.¬†At all costs we must try and avoid taking the roads, they are a death trap. The traffic alone is a nightmare and the layout make no sense. Have you seen a map of Sydney, it looks like a toddler drew it. God knows how Covid ever managed to get out.”


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