Coalition announces shock nuclear meltdown

After months of telling the public that their policies wouldn’t lead to any nuclear fallouts, the leaders of the Liberal and National parties today announced a shock meltdown in their party room.

The shock malfunction marks a sudden end to nearly 8 decades of constant operation.

“This is going to spew toxic vibes all over parliament,” one Liberal staffer was overheard telling an emergency-response consultant.

“I’m not sure how we are going to survive this so shortly after our most recent mass election extinction event.”

An expert from the Lucas Height generator in Sydney told the Chaser “Look these things are a little bit outside of my expertise but I would say their uh, nuclear approach to things, was not a sustainable form of energy.”

It is believed that the Prime Minister has declared that he is “incredibly safe… perhaps even safer than I was a day ago” from any fallout.