Government considering senior citizen social media ban after Trump’s debate performance

The Australian government has announced it will ban senior citizens from social media after today’s US Presidential debate.

“We changed the policy after hearing Trump ramble about eating pets and executing babies,” a spokesperson said, “we were so focused on protecting children from the internet, we forgot to protect the internet from the elderly.”

The former president fired off a series of lies, which were clearly scraped from the underbelly of social media, (otherwise known as Twitter).  

“Allowing the elderly to have access to social media is just too great a risk”, the spokesperson continued. “We don’t allow people to operate heavy machinery after a certain age, so why would we let them use Facebook? They’re clearly a threat to the people around them.”

Australia’s geriatrics are expected to respond as soon as their grandchildren show them how to reset their Hotmail password.