Canberra’s cocaine dealers pull all-nighter in preparation for tomorrow’s budget lock-up

Cocaine dealers around the nation’s capital have been non-stop working today to meet the demand that comes with tomorrow’s budget lock-up.

While the Canberra cocaine industry has been one of the few industry’s to hold strong in this economy, the day before budget lock-up always puts extreme pressure on these local entrepreneurs.

“Each year it’s chaotic but and somehow always feels worse than the previous years,” said dealer Jeremy rushing to reply to ten different clients with massive orders, “but that’s how crunch time always is.”

“Between the politicians, staffers, journalists and now content creators; it’s the busiest night of the year.”