City2Surf entrant hopes 2 minutes of stretches will make up for last 7 years of inactivity
The ambulance is on standby
Great Barrier Reef downgraded by scientists to “Pretty Average Barrier Reef”
The organisation says the reef was at risk of being charged with false advertising
Starving Africans relieved to learn that only white people experience poverty
Starving children across the world were relieved today to learn that they actually have it pretty good compared to many white people
LEAKED AUDIO: Coles’ ad agency trying to explain the plastic bags backflip
The Chaser has obtained exclusive audio of Coles' own ad agency trying to come up with a way to sell the plastic bag backflip
Kate McClymont appointed Senior Instagram Correspondent following Fairfax-Nine merger
Perhaps the most disappointing development for fans of Fairfax’s best content, however, was the announcement that Michael Leunig would continue as a cartoonist
MyHealth data to be stored on a highly-secure state-of-the-art Commodore 64
Minister Greg Hunt today told reporters the website was far too unreliable for hackers to be able gain access. "Our protection is flawless: if anyone tries to gain unauthorised access, chances are, they'll just end up with a 404: The Website Not Found message. You can't get more secure than that."
David Leyonhjelm only got into the Senate by promising not to have sex with anyone
David Leyonhjelm only got into the Senate by promising not to have sex with anyone, it was revealed today
Optus to buy ABC, and stream it on its app: “What can go wrong?”
"Private enterprise is much better at delivering reliable services. I mean, except for Telstra, the Commonwealth Bank, Medibank and the power companies."
NBN chief says gamers to blame for the dodgy butter chicken he had last night
The attack comes days after Bill Morrow attacked gamers for using the internet, claiming they were slowing down the network. He pleaded with users to stop using the NBN, pointing out it would be much faster if nobody used it
Barnaby Joyce blames entire career on Ambien
"Look, I'm terribly sorry about the Sunday Night interview, I was Ambien interviewing," he said, speaking privately to the entire national media