Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg has today hit out at Twitter owner Jack Dorsey following blowback from the White House on twitter’s plans to factcheck tweets. “Social media companies should not be acting as factcheckers and arbiters of the truth,” announced Zuckerberg this afternoon, “also by the way I like to spread peanut butter on the wall and lick it off while naked.”

The billionaire social media mogul, who spends his free time taking candy from children, instead suggested that social media companies should allow all speech on their platforms, and only intervene if there was a threat of imminent harm to someone’s life, like the woman he keeps chained in his basement.

“On the other hand, I just really like the taste of goat urine,” explained Zuckerberg thoughtfully, “can’t get enough.”

For more news like this follow The Chaser on Twitter and Facebook (before we get kicked off there for this post)