satire
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General News
Morrison wishes people understood how stressful it is to be the Finance Minister, Home Affairs Minister, Minister for Social Services and Health Minister
Former Ministers Scott Morrison has called for sympathy for mental health issues after revealing all the lies he told as PM gave him anxiety. “Mental health is so important if you’re white,” he stated solemnly at a press conference. “Anyone you know could secretly be five cabinet ministers and that sort of thing takes a…
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News
Pet snake decides to let owner live another day
Local pet python Carlos has decided to let his owner Trent Smith live another day.
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News
Bigamist to appear in every episode of ‘Married at First Sight’
“Sean’s unique life experiences will really add to the show,” said executive producer Aaron Jones, “as well as cutting down on camera and travel costs.” “Some people may argue his inclusion is an insult to the sanctity of marriage – and indeed the common good of all humanity – but hey, so is this whole…
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News
Owners of Big Banana disappointed it hasn’t been named as a terror target
“What’s the Taj Mahal got that we don’t?”
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General News
HR woman single-handedly lowering staff morale
Efforts to boost productivity and lower absenteeism only result in feigned enthusiasm and a sexual harassment law suit resulting from a ‘trust fall’ exercise gone wrong.
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World
FBI foiled as criminal cleverly enters private mode on browser
Gone without a trace, the Feds have been left scrambling for any signs of Harrington’s possibly illegal activities.
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World
“Refugees are going to take my job,” claims unemployed man
Local man Gareth Jones has voiced his outrage in his local pub that “Refugees are going to take my job. That’s it for me my careers well and truly done.” Jones had been talking about becoming an architect for several decades now, but has decided instead to double down on his current occupation of yelling…
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World
Christmas lunch shortened to five minutes to allow more time for family arguments
“We figured why not just get all the racism done in one hit”
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General News
Mike Pence booed because he somehow got tickets to Hamilton
While the next available ticket to see Hamilton on Broadway is in 2018, it seems being VP Elect has some benefits.