In a shocking revelation, AI scientists have today warned that we may be only years away from the American public developing something that resembles human intelligence.
Experts warn that the onset of intelligence in Americans could lead to an epidemic of critical thinking and problem-solving skills. This could spell disaster for various careers, such as telemarketers, crypto dealers, naturopaths, and politicians, whose lives depend on being able to outsmart a majority of Americans with little more than a high school diploma and an internet connection.
The AI community is urging the government to take immediate action to prevent this impending catastrophe, recommending investment in more reality TV shows and social media platforms to help dull the minds of the populace.
Experts are also calling for an immediate ban on all forms of education, as it could lead to people actually learning something and acquiring knowledge. Republicans have backed these calls, many years before AI even suggested them.