The Chaser Weakly
Stop criticising us
Issue #280
• Posted
This newsletter is brought to you by the NACC, now letting politicians have some corruption as a little treat.
Dear Australia,
Prime Minister DJ Albo from the block here. A disgusting trend has started in the last six months. Political types have begun politicising the political actions of my government in attempts to hurt the political futures of those involved.
I’m talking about the Political Greens Political Party of Party Politics. You might be wondering what this group did. Did they bomb a refugee camp or a UN School? No, they did something far more evil.
They have been involved in misinformation campaigns directly criticising us. Which, frankly, is not surprising coming from the Australian wing of Hamas.
These violent attacks against our polling numbers have no place in this country. We need to stamp out these protests against my government, as they make for a major threat to the social cohesion that comes when everyone blindly trusts the government.
Sure in 2019 I said that a government who attacks the rights of protesters are a threat to democracy, but that was a completely different context. You see, those protests were against a government that wasn’t my one.
Do not ask us what the misinformation they’re spreading is, as the examples are so scary and bad that even repeating them for fact-checking purposes would be a danger to you and your family.
The stuff the Political Greens Political Party have been saying may leave you with questions like “is Australia making weapons parts and fighter jet parts that are currently being sold to the IDF leading to them being used in the slaughter of tens of thousands of civilians?” And while yes, we are doing that, we would prefer if you all looked at it as a way of securing social cohesion with the ordinary, everyday, well-meaning pro-genocide members of the community.
Tell me, do you want to see our nation be one that listens to those woke ‘human rights experts’ who want to divide us by the arbitrary political line of ‘whether you support genocide or not’?
You can choose to make this country into a giant version of the awkward Christmas lunch with that uncle you no longer speak to, or you can take pride in the Australian tradition of turning a blind eye.
Yours,
Anthony Albanese
Prime Minister of Australia