BREAKING: CovidSafe data breach leads to hackers gaining absolutely no data on anyone

The Australian government has today rushed to inform all 3 users of the CovidSafe app that their personal data would have been compromised had any information actually been collected by the app in the last three years.

According to leaked reports from inside the government, experts believe Russian hackers may have breached CovidSafe’s databases last month, after a spreadsheet was posted on the darkweb featuring the details of a Mr “Test Account” and Mrs “Demo User”, who are believed to be the only users who ever signed up on the app.

Replacement drivers licences and passports will be offered to anyone whose private details are linked to the leak, so they can start a new life after the embarrassing revelation that they put their faith in a tech product developed as a front for handing a bunch of taxpayer money to a mate of Scott Morrison.

Tech experts are suggesting anyone with the app on their phone delete it immediately, though this is largely unrelated to the recent hack.

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