General News
Peter Dutton sues The Body Shop for false advertising

Federal Minister and ominous spectre Peter Dutton has today risen from a deep slumber to enact vengeance on the townspeople of his electorate, after being informed by servants that the local Body Shop is all out of bodies.

“Vwat do you mean zer is no bodies!” Dutton was heard screaming from the highest tower of his castle. “My dinner is ruined! You shall suffer for this Igor! Bring me my favorite cat of 9 tails immediately.”

The Minister for Transilvania was even more upset to learn that his local second hand store was completely out of hands. “Vwat am I supposed to nail hundreds of to my wall now!?” Dutton yelled at the local cashier. “I will destroy you and everyone you love, but first could I get three of these rocks with the googly eyes.”


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