General News

The Pope has once again ramped up his war against the soulless, inhumane, unable-to-feel-joy AI founders and their slop machines.

“They dodged our Eurovision questions, but we wont let the network do this again!”

“The chill guy persona always goes away once a woman stops feeding the DJ’s ego.”

The plucky self-made entrepreneur may now be forced to pay a little bit of tax.

Other outlets have decided all future references to sauce will be framed with ‘the fish and chip shop claims there isn’t a death tax’.

“It’s very normal for someone of your age”

“If anything changes, I will be forced to raise it by the exact amount I already will be” he said to the media.

“Between the politicians, staffers, journalists and content creators; it’s the busiest night of the year.”

This after he bought his way into being ‘honorary co-chair’, which is the only way for him to ever be invited to a party.

“I wish he was caught sooner. To think of all the victims of both his crimes and his writing who could have been protected.”