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Queen pays for Charles & Camilla’s honeymoon: books driving tour of Paris

The Queen of England has endorsed Prince Charles’ plans to wed Camilla Parker-Bowles, saying she would treat Camilla “like any other daughter-in-law”. The palace confirmed that in accordance with tradition the Queen would drive Charles’ new wife out of the family, preferably to an early death in a Paris tunnel.

Paris has been a popular holiday destination for numerous Princesses of Wales

The Queen of England has endorsed Prince Charles’ plans to wed Camilla Parker-Bowles, saying she would treat Camilla “like any other daughter-in-law”.

The palace confirmed that in accordance with tradition the Queen would drive Charles’ new wife out of the family, preferably to an early death in a Paris tunnel.

Royalwatchers have welcomed the prospect of “another fairytale wedding” for Charles, although they concede that in this case the prince is marrying the wicked witch. Prince Phillip has also been positive towards Camilla, confiding in reporters, “at least she’s not a darkie.”

“I’m giddy with excitement,” the Prince of Wales said after his announcement, “I’m looking forward to marrying a woman I love, almost as much as I’m looking forward to mommy dying.”

Aides say the Queen has already prepared a romantic honeymoon for Charles and Camilla, which will include a tasting tour of France’s finest vineyards for the couple’s driver. If the romantic adventure does not end as the Queen wishes, it is expected that Elizabeth would enlist the help of the secret service.

“We killed Diana to make sure the heir to the throne didn’t get a bastard half-brother,” said one MI6 agent. “But with Camilla, it’ll be more like a labour of love.”

But while the Secret Service prepares for the honeymoon, fashion experts have turned to their attention to the impending royal wedding. “We all know Camilla’s going to look like a godawful sundried meringue,” said one designer, “but the big question is, ‘What’s Harry going to wear to the wedding?'”

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