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Cam Smith

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Liberal party unanimously elect Alan Jones leader after hearing him use N-word on air
"We never thought we'd manage to find someone more objectionable than Peter Dutton. How wrong we were."
NBN boss blames slow speeds on everyone refreshing their browser to check who’s Prime Minister
"P-- lea-- se st--o-p u-s-in--g t-the in-tern--et." begged the CEO via Skype
Malcolm Turnbull removes spine in fresh bid to save leadership
"Take that Abbott!" laughed Turnbull from his hospital bed
Toyota to phase out indicators on all new vehicles, citing lack of use
"Nobody was using them anyway"
World celebrates progress as Hollywood casts black man to play violent gun-wielding murderer
Take that, typecasting!
Victoria to introduce involuntary euthanasia for families that walk side-by-side on footpath
"Frankly it's the humane thing to do."
City2Surf entrant hopes 2 minutes of stretches will make up for last 7 years of inactivity
The ambulance is on standby
Renegade teaspoon ruining it for rest of cutlery basket
NEWS IN
End of Crocs footwear mourned by virgins worldover
"Guess it's back to the socks and sandals then"
Starving Africans relieved to learn that only white people experience poverty
Starving children across the world were relieved today to learn that they actually have it pretty good compared to many white people